Save me

Dear T,

I am so grateful that someone has finally read the report (I refer to it as 'rubbish' sometimes - simply because it IS!). I cannot express how grateful I am that someone has finally criticised what was written in there.

Yes, it was not logical. Yes, the English was beyond atrocious.

I have been working on the template for weeks and I found it to be a mess. I tried to change a few areas of it but was then questioned for 'the original text...what happened to it?' I didn't feel like I needed to justify changing sentences that conveyed no message to a complete sentence. I was told the tables were OK and that I didn't need to change them. But of course, this was otherwise.

I am also curious till today how you could work with such a character for so long! For this report to surpass his attention is absolutely amazing. I felt embarrassed for him yet in some ways happy that you know everything gets through him! You see, he can't deal with a page of more than 50 words. He loses attention and tells you he doesn't understand. What do you mean you don't understand? You've been on this project for 6 months, me, 2 weeks, what don't you understand?

As I was working on your comments (which I love, by the way), I was approached by my MD only to be told that you were having a bad day when you were reviewing the report.

I shrugged. Is this simply a statement to cover his ass? Or was it true? Were you having a bad day? Could you have worded 'horrible' in any nicer way? Note: the 'horrible' comment was for a statement that MD had written. While writing it, he also told me that I needed to do research if I didn't know anything. Shucks, I guess I wasn't being pro-active. Shame on me.

After making the report sound more logical, he tells me that I have not addressed your comments. Typos like 40,000 and 400,000 should not have surpassed me. I actually noticed the typo after he submitted the report to you but I was shivering as he told me I should be responsible for my reports, reports should be complete when I send them to him, what have you been doing for the past three days and (include more abusive statements here). Should I have been on the job for more than that, I would take full responsibility for not properly reviewing the document. Heck, after 2.5 weeks, I thought it was brilliant, and that I had a serious problem with my English.

Which comes to my second point for writing this letter to you. After working with my MD for two months plus, it has come to my attention that 9/10 times, he has absolutely no idea what he is talking about. Are you aware of this? Do you know how difficult it is to work with a person who doesn't know what he's talking about?

We are often instructed to do one task AT LEAST three times, simply because he doesn't know what to expect. His expectations, however, can sometimes be quite...let's see how to put this nicely...stupid? He once requested that a table be present in both summary and conclusion. I didn't do it, of course, never before have I seen a table appear twice in the same report. He then questioned whether I understood his request, and why I keep forgetting, and that I should start writing things down - I am now convinced I am not performing well in this job.

It's as if we have never done a report before. Actually, it's as if we haven't done ANYTHING before.

MD: *screams* WHY DID YOU CHANGE THIS?
Me: Because it doesn't reflect on what's happening.
MD: Well, don't change it. You aren't supposed to change this.

A day, two days, a week later - depending on when he's in the 'mood' to review your work.
MD: This doesn't make sense.
Me (in my heart): of course, you fuckin' idiot. I told you the first time but you wrote me off.
MD: You have to change it to this.
Me (in my heart): Which was what I did the first time, you dumbass! If you had read it the first time, would I need to re-do this shit again.

I seem to have no problem working with the other senior consultants - they tell me they want, and I provide them with it within the timeline. I do also ASK when required, because they are more approachable than him, and when I ask them, they actually answer. Correctly. I have asked my MD questions. He tells me 'A' but actually wants 'C'. Which is a real waste of time, because if you wanted me to do 'C' in the first place, tell me to do GODDAM 'C' FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

Me: Hey, there aren't any maps for Region F
MD: There are! Didn't you look on the server, they are there.
Me (in my heart): If I didn't look, would I have brought this problem up with you?

I am dismissed.
With no solution. No maps. Bravo! I think he deserves a medal for management.

So, you see, Tim, it hasn't all been great so far working with your company. I hope you know that he runs it like the military, but to the outside world, it looks more like a circus. At meetings, the Client can ask a question 3-4 times (the same question) but your stupid friend doesn't answer the question! He goes round and round and you can see that the Client clearly knows that this dude knows so little, or has a problem understanding simple English.

I am expressing my frustration and anger, and deeply hope that you can act on it, or find means to save me in order for me to regain my sanity.

Thanks,
ML.

p/s: I also love that I have drafted the other eight (8) reports to look exactly like this :)